Shame on me.

My guilt has an amiable friendship with my grief. I must have fallen from a grocery store shopping-cart as a child.

For as long as I had my hands on him and his voice to my ear, it was the most delicious time of my life. Of course we’ve had our ups and downs. The pressure is intence when two people share their lives but Oh…what marvellous intencity it was. I thought I’d never see him again and if true agony were the mother of gloom, she would have her hand on my head right now. I’ve waited for months just to whisper, ~My Darling~ softly into his ear. I was given that chance once again and it was the only thing I wanted. Unfortunatly I did an exceptional job of annihilating it with little effort, on the very first day. I don't know why I did it.

Shame on me. I thought that I was falling apart in April…know what? Nope! Now I can truly say that I can physically feel the little rotten pieces of me breaking apart and falling to the floor smashing like brittle rock because after all, my heart must have been made of stone. He wanted to spend this time with me and I wasn't me.

I am so ashamed of myself.

Teresa.